LAUGH & LAUGH

Police arrested a drunkard & asked: Where are you going?

Man: I'm going to a lecture on ill effects of drinking.
Cop: Who'll lecture at midnight?
Man: My wife......
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Banta was travelling in an auto rickshaw with his wife. The driver adjusted the mirror.
Banta shouted: You are trying to see my wife!!!! Sit back. I'll drive..
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After robbing a bank, one robber to clerk : Did you see me robbing?
Clerk : Yes I saw u.
Robber killed him and asked to the next clerk : Did u?
Second Clerk : No, but my wife saw u!
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Meaning of WIFE,

Husband asks:"Do you know the meaning of WIFE"?
it means.......
"WITHOUT INFORMATION FIGHTING EVERYTIME"
Wife on hearing this says,"it could also mean ......
WITH IDIOT FOREVER."
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Judge: Don't you have shame? It is the 3rd time you are coming to court.
Sardar to judge: You are coming daily, don't you have shame?
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Teacher : Four beautiful ladies are walking on the road. Change it to exclamatory sentence .
Student : WOW !
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Teacher : U failure ! @ ur age Bill gates stood first in the class.
Student : Sir, but @ ur age Hitler committed suicide.
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A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min..
A beer shortens your life by 4 min..
A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!..
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During Marriage ceremony why is the bridegroom made to sit on the horse ?
He is given his last chance to run away.
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A husband, the owner of a new car, was somewhat reluctant to allow his wife to drive his prize possession even to the grocery store, which was a few blocks from the house.

After she insisted, he finally relented, cautioning her as she departed: "Remember, if you have an accident, the newspaper will print your age.”
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HOPE YOU ALL ENJOYED IT.